Dilemma

What do you do when you feel pressured to be someone's friend or like someone out of obligation to someone else?

This question has been plaguing me for some time. I have two people who fall into this category. Two people that I am not fond of and would like to stop associating with. The reality of the situation is that it would cause a rift. One would be with my husband and his friend (and I would never want him to lose a friend over this) and the other would be with family.

I feel stuck between a rock and a hard place. Forced to try to be friends with people that I don't trust. What do you do in a situation like this?

Finances

I do the finances in our household. My husband works a lot and that's just what works out best for us. I keep him in the loop telling him what bills are paid when and how much they were and give him an update on our bank accounts often. It really is a lot of work.

It's no surprise that things are going to be a little tight this summer. I'm not working which means that we only have one source of income until late August. I'm hoping to draw as little as possible from our savings, but it seems to be inevitable at this point.

Money is something that seems sort of taboo when it comes to friends. I know that I get embarrassed to say that we "can't afford" something, but when it comes to having the latest and greatest or having savings to fall back on, it's a no-brainer. But, that doesn't make it any easier to tell someone that you can't afford to buy something from their home business or that you can't go to the movies because they are friggin expensive!

I'm trying to find balance with it all. My husband is a saver and I am, by nature, a spender. It makes me feel good to go out and buy something, especially when you get a great deal for it, but that's not always the best course of action. Fortunately, with me doing the finances, I know when to cut back and when it's ok to spend a little more. Right now, it's time to cut back.

My biggest areas of weakness are eating out and buying things for our home. I love to go out to eat. There are no dishes to clean up, the food tastes good, someone else waits on you, and I don't have to cook! The downside...cost and calories. As with buying things for our home, I feel the need to nest. It's a woman thing. Making our home look nice makes me feel good. We just rearranged the apartment and it makes me want to buy things to make it look better. No, these things aren't needed, but I want them.

Since it's time to cut back, I'm going to make an effort to not eat out as much and to not shop for things we don't need. This is going to be difficult, but it can be done and it will make my husband very happy.

What are your best suggestions for saving money? I already coupon and shop for sales. Any other suggestions?

Summer Projects

The great thing about teaching is being off for the summer. Of course, this means that I should probably keep busy and start some kind of project. There are a few things that I've been thinking of and I couldn't be more excited.

• Redecorating the apartment. We still aren't fully "settled" here so finishing the decorating portion of it would be fantastic and really make it feel more like home.
 
• Cross-stitching. I have a counted pattern that I've been working on and I can't wait to see the completed project. It's going to take a while, but the work is worth it.
 
• Keyboard? We picked up a keyboard for me to start learning how to play (again) and I'm hoping to put some time into it. I've never fully picked it up, but it's been an on and off again thing for years. Hopefully this will be a good summer to do that.

 

What are your summer plans?



Faker

I feel like a fraud.

I don't know how to manage my roles in life.

Wife. Seems simple, right? Wrong. I feel the constant need to take care of my house and my husband and that doesn't always work out so well. In the beginning of our marriage I completely enjoyed making his lunch and getting his coffee ready for the next day. Now, it feels more like a chore and he has been taking care of it for the longest time and it makes me feel awful. In addition to this, I have the hardest time keeping things picked up around the house. It doesn't help that my new physical limitations make it so that I'm supposed to stay off of my feet and rest my knee whenever I can. Great.

Teacher. I survived the first year! But, the truth is that I feel no more confident for the next year than I did for my first year. We have decided to change the curriculum and it makes me both excited and nervous all at the same time. I'm really hoping that my fears are relieved next year and that I will really find my niche in teaching.

Do you ever feel like a fraud? Like you have to pretend that you know what you are doing when you feel like yo have no clue? Please, someone rescue me!